Monday, April 9, 2018

letting go

The process of leaving this time round is a hard one.  I keep thinking about this and trying to figure out why.  The last time we left to go sailing the kids were little and it was a ton of work, but in my memory anyway, it was all go.  No looking back at all. 

Now, it's harder.  There are things I am going to very actively miss.

I think that there may be two reasons for this, one is that I have worked so very hard to integrate into the culture, learn the language, make friends, find my place, that it is hard to walk away from all of that.

The other is that Toronto is my home.  It will always be there for me.  I have tons of friends and I know the streets, and there is family there and work.  It will always be and has always been mine, and we go back every year.  I know we will go back every year. 

We can commit to coming back here every year, but will that happen?  The dentist and the dermatologist will be the ties that force us back.  Odd isn't it, the things you like so little about a place are what will bring you back.  That said, she's a great dentist and I adore my dermatologist despite his extremely awkward social manner. It's just that it is something that we h.a.v.e. to do. 

I hope we come back regularly.  There is so much I love here. 


elPadawan said...

It is an odd feeling when you're about to embark on that kind of journey, isn't it? Yet, at the same time, I've noticed that whenever the move actually happens, we adapt pretty well. Well, the new situations force us to adapt. So much to do and take care of, usually there's no time to actually be homesick.

oreneta said...

The actual goodbyes are the hardest, once you are over that hurdle it gets easier. Or busier. Not sure which at this juncture !!!!