Tinc RABIA

OK...I was going to post photos of the paintings I am working on, and ones I have finished but I have been overwhelmed by the Forces Of Bureaucracy...I am not a happy camper here, so.....

Hold onto your hats ladies and gentlemen....I am pissed(off). (sorry Mom I know you hate that word, but sometimes....)

The paperwork and bureaucracy in this country are un-frickin'-believable.

I went into town today to look for the Europe-wide health card. I carefully checked the website for the information I needed and then brought in more. I am learning. (what I really need to do is drag the entire f'ing apartment in.)

I couldn't get the man's card, because I needed a photocopy of his DNI, national ID card, which he has to carry everywhere. SO his O.R.G.I.N.A.L. Spanish passport won't do...no no no, has to be a frickin' fotocopìa of his DNI.

I did get mine.

The girls, nononononononononoNO....they need a NIE, the number I have, but they are ineligible for a NIE as they are Canadian, and I have a European passport. So in order to get them this STUPID health card that extends the care they ALREADY HAVE to the rest of Spain and Europe I have to go through the entire application process for residency permission as if they had just got off the boat from Senegal, or flown in from Ecuador, despite the fact that their frickin' father is SPANISH, and they already have HEALTHCARE HERE.

Then I have to go upstairs for a piece of paper, because our real health card number is not actually the number on our health card, and the number on our health card we cannot actually use for anything but the doctors and pharmacies, we need this other number for I don't know what else. Making stupid foreign people go mad I suppose; and horrors, I don't actually know what my real health card number is, which is not the number on my health card, THAT is another number; nor does the rest of my family, nor most Spaniards either.

*breathing deeply*

NO

*snorting smoke out my frickin' nose*

I'm cool with this.

Then I go to the accountant for the Spanish taxes, get a whole new list of required items, my bank book with our entire banking history for the year (feels a mite invasive that), photocopies of the inevitable DNI and NIE (see above), some bank certificate (???), some other certificate from our bosses (probably a T4 for Canadians), our rent receipts, the children's name and birth date. Not too bad, the bank provided their form with their usual delightful speed and charm (no irony there, they really are the nicest bank I have ever dealt with and then even nicer than that); I spent an hour sorting files and getting the information collated, ordered, and stapled in like groups...good to go.

We apparently don't have to declare our Canadian income. Sounds like a "trampa", which is Catalan for a cheat or lie. Yes, I think that word sounds like something a little different too.

We can do our own taxes it turns out if we don't have to declare the Canadian stuff,(like I want more on the to do list, but I don't want to pay an accountant if I don't have to). A friend is going to phone the help line for me and find out if this is true or not. Taxes introduce a whole new world of vocab my friends, and I don't know much of it.

OK, I'm still cool, groovin' with the paperwork...then I go off to gather the papers required to enroll Eldest in the next school (we still don't know which one, and I am not sure what to do, as this week is the week to sign them up and we don't find out till next week if she got into the school we're hoping for. Kind of weird, huh?) (((I am luvin' these brackets today aren't I.)))

For this, I am armed with a new form with a list of forms, which states that I need:

You guessed it..... DNI and NIE, originals and photocopies,
Original and photocopy of birth and marriage certificate (both of which are doing a grand tour of offices in Ottawa as they swim through the glacial process of pursuing citizenship here for the kids. Then they get to go to Madrid for translation, back here for submission, back to Madrid for scrutinisation and god know what else)

Fortunately, I have two copies! WHAT FORESIGHT!!!

This is even better, the Man and I even had the foresight to get married twice! If you ever plan on going expat, this is a VERY GOOD IDEA. Then you can have papers in two different offices at once! (We had a Baha'í and civic ceremony)

I also have translations of said items (originals and photocopies) which I will take with me on the principle of bringing more than they ask for, then you have a fighting chance of having what they WILL spring on you.

A copy of the form we filled in to apply. (Thank god I kept THAT) Why do they want it, they lost their original????

Original and photocopy of the kids Passport, DNI, whatever.

Certificate issued by the town hall that we do live where we say we do. I am doing so much of this paper chasing that I actually have a copy of this for all of us that is still valid in the house. They expire after three months so you keep having to go back again and again and again.

A contract from work, unspecified whose ????WTF?????? (original and photocopy) The line that asks for the contract (original and photocopy) names the requirement then after a comma says, "if this is what makes you happy". Sooooo, do I not bring it if I hate my job??? Oh the joy of forms in a language you don't completely understand.

Sorry this is getting long, it looks like my day.

Then there are five other forms that I don't need to bring,

Finally this, which I realise at this second I don't have orginised: a photocopy of her last report card (like the freaking school isn't going to forward it anyway) where DID I put that???? (it is six pages long!)

Then

then then then then THEN

At 11pm, in Eldest's room, I discover, languishing, another form from the SAME school asking for this....

-The form we filled in when we applied (I don't have the original, hope they like the photocopy)

-Photocopy of the vaccine records

-Photocopy of her health card

-Our bank info so they can, and I quote, in translation, so that they can do withdraws for things (fancier word) over the length of the course.

HUH?????

Hello, when have you heard of a public school that can just DIVE into your account when it needs to pay for something.

WHAT THE F*CK?

Plus

PLUS

PLUS

53 Euros.

Remember what the plumber cost? That was 13.

53 Euros is closing in on 70 bucks. To sign up for public school.

WTF?

Welcome to sunny Communist Russia Spain.

Have you noticed that the two seperate lists, from the same school issued for the same child, only duplicate one item? Can we get the left hand chatting with the freakin' right hand here so we can get ONE list with, say, all the items on it at once????

OH, and the title of the post? I love this. Tinc means "I have"...and if you're really really really frickin' angry, indeed enraged, you use the word rabia, as in rabies...

I have rabies.

Not far off.

A little head twitching?

check

Some staggering?

Check!

Foaming at the mouth?

Batting 1000 here Tex.

FUN WOW.

PS. I also managed to stop off at the beach...can I tell you how lovely it is? Look what else I found there...look look look!!!!

Montserrat and dog barf.

Good lord what a lot of public transit today. Hours of it, but well worth it to my mind.

We went back to Montserrat again today, and we had better luck with the weather, we could see for further than about 6 feet. It was quite astonishing to walk up the same trail and discover all the statuary at the side of the path that we hadn't seen!

We didn't go into the church this time, which was OK by everyone. Instead we walked in the hills, well, we took a (very) expensive funicular trip up, then walked down...with the kids along it seemed easier. The views were amazing, and let me tell you, the Russians like Montserrat...they were everywhere! Many of them spoke excellent English too.

Here's some pics....



Montserrat means serrated mountain which you can kinda see, and it is the much beloved spiritual heart of Catalonia, I have to say I love it up there too. The combination of the architecture, the paintings in the museum (we saw Monet, Picasso, Sargent, Renoir (a bad one) Degas, El Greco, etc etc etc...) and the mountains to walk in, along with good cafés all makes for a very nice day.

As they say, location location location....



There were lots of hikers and climbers there as well, something I would like to do a little more of there someday.

And to have a small world moment, I ran into one of my students from where we live! I am really starting to feel like I am slipping edgeways into a corner of the community here, running into Catalans I know in major tourist destinations, though it is a very important Catalan destination to...

A fantastic day. Too bad we can't take Chuck on some of the public transit, he would have LOVED it. Maybe barfed to, he's not so good in cars etc. I hate to imagine what he would do on our boat.

Swab the decks again me hearty's the dogs fouled them one more time!

Paid the plumber today....

GUESS, just g.u.e.s.s. how much the plumber cost.

Go on,

I dare you.

This is the same man who asked for a cloth to clean up the two tablespoons of water he spilt.

This is the same man who then wiped everything down when he finished, including the sink.

Go on.....how much do you think?

The answer is in the post below, just to keep you guessing a little longer...

So, what do you think?

And the number was.....

_{photo by Tesla314 from Flickr}



You ready for this???

13 Euros.

Yes indeed...

13.

Holy plumber butt batman!

Which he didn't display I might add.

Heaven.

The to do list that never happened.

I was very slow and dopey this morning.

It shows the impact I usually have. We had the most peaceful morning getting ready for school. Everyone on time, everyone calm, no shouting. I only forgot snack for youngest.

It must be me causing all the chaos...what am I doing?

Either that or I was so somnolent I didn't notice much, and they didn't bother whining to the walking zombie that looked faintly like their mom.

Nap? Check. Two and a half hours for crying out loud.

Paint? Nope.

Work from on line? Nope, internet went down, after my marathon nap I lay on the couch and read.

Pay the plumber? Nope.

Visit the accountant for the Spanish taxes? Nope

Teach? Yes indeed-y and it was OK....

Tutor my favourite market lady's daughter who is failing English? Yup

Meeting on Friday night at 7pm?!?!?!?!? Yup.

Walk the dog? Kind of, three short and pathetics, he didn't get to the mountain today. I slept too much.

Movie night with the family...YES!!!!

Sleep on the couch again to avoid the ambulatory mass of pestilence masquerading as my husband with a cold? Yes indeed-y. I fly in two weeks and then drop into a stunningly intense work schedule. I SO don't want a cold.

Boy was that nap awesome. I had thought of a little gentle yoga...na, too much effort.

Pathetic, isn't it.

Another rather long day...blogger is working though.

Another day of overwhelming rushing around...here's a few vignettes

Forgot to give eldest her medicine this morning (only the most important thing I have to do in the entire day) so I was late to work as I had to backtrack to get the meds, then go to the school etc etc etc.

The plumber came, what a dream...he can come back. The few drops of water he spilled he ASKED me for a cloth and cleaned it up himself, then wiped it all down when he left, even the sink!!! OMG!!!

Instead of eating lunch, I visited the doctor, booked the plumber and cleaned the bathroom. NOT my favourite task. I got cranky.

Walking the dog with a friend I had a sandwich with me, and she was kind enough to stoop and scoop for me as I was eating, then she ended up carrying it a LONG way as we were talking so much I never got a chance to eat.

Chuck was such a wimpy mama's boy this morning we couldn't give him his shot (which really does hurt a lot, apparently the medicine forms crystals under his skin) *shudder*. He was whining and crying and jumping and squirming and twisting, at one point we had the needle embedded in his back, and I had to let go of it as he was spinning around, and the needle was doing it's own seperate wild dance. Not prescribed technique.

Add the vet to today's list.

The receptionist and gave him the shot as the vet was away. I handled the needle as the more experienced of the two of us. Poor Chuck. Not a peep, and didn't move a muscle. Like a kid, eh?

The man has suddenly developed a horrid cold. I have a back ache. I am seriously considering the couch. And ibuprofen. I so so so so so do not want a cold right now. SO.

Tomorrow morning I have a few errands. Some chores. NAP is however at the top of the list with PAINT following closely.

Enough of this crap.

way way way too much.

Yesterday was so unbelievably and outrageously chore filled and overfull that I even found myself with my head under the sink, at midnight, fixing the plumbing.

The problem is further down the pipe where it is embedded in the wall. The part I can reach is squeaky clean though.

Onto the list for Thursday....plumber.

Then after that as I sat down to type a small comment before crashing....blogger closed up on me.

Good lord.

Listen up

I have only one thing to say today.

Eldest and I went back to the hospital (again).

THEY FOUND A PARASITE!!!!!! (I cannot believe how excited I am that she HAS a parasite)

WE HAVE A DIAGNOSIS AND A TREATMENT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

She has to take some pills for three days. It seems ungodly easy after two years.

Please please please let this be it.

Let it be the only problem.

The thinking is that she has a (translation from Catalan here) migrating parasite that she picked up through her skin while swimming. UGH.

Everyone, please cross your fingers for her.

Let this be O.V.E.R....

ummmm, glum, isn't that a great word?

Glum.

That is a fantastic word.

It is funny sounding and onomatopoeic.

I hate the word rural, probably because I find it hard to say.

I also like resorcinol...a kind of glue, which is also hard to say, kind of like aerobics for the tongue, but somehow I like that word...

I also like made up words like youngests' ovideous. It is very very bad if you get called that.

Then there are the semi-made up ones like galumphs, or glopulets...

Seems I like gl combos...I don't like y's at the ends of words though.

What's your favourite word, and why?

Hercule Puré

We watched some beach volleyball today, right in downtown BCN, Youngest was delighted. She far prefers sports to the gallery we were heading to. At least we got a bit of both in. She was largely bored by the Catalan national gallery, which I largely wasn't, then we went on to see some more modern stuff, she found that more engaging, and so did I. It spoke to her in a way she can relate to, in a way that is most relevant to NOW.

One artist, and forgive me, I forget his full name, but he is German and has Hesse as a last name, or something similar...was F.R.E.A.K.Y. but also very funny...Youngest was certainly engaged, lets see if she dreams about it...he had one hilarious section, he was doing some riffs on Agatha Christie...but he referred to Herucle Puréeeee. Heheheheheee

This computer is not a happy beast, it is freezing up over and over and over, and I am having to delete temp files and defrag far far too often for a 'puter that claims to have 56% of its hard drive free. This does not bode well.

Painting continues. We saw some Catalan painters from the 19th C, they are demi-gods here, though on the global art scene less so, that said, they knew what they were doing and there were some lovely pieces...which I cannot link to today as my windows keep freezing up. You'd think it was January in Canada....

I also think that the yellow painting with the doorway may just be done, I am debating the inclusion of one more aspect, but I'll have to look at it for a while and see. This is a good thing as I have so many pieces on the go it is nearly unmanageable. The darned computer is frozen again, I am going to post this while I can, sorry, no pics today....it just isn't in the cards, more likely it just isn't in the computer chips. Grrrrr.

I looked at that painting again, and it's not done yet, more tomorrow.